My Dearest Ex-Husband,
I received your letter, and I must admit, it brought an unexpected mixture of emotions. Yes, we’ve shared seven years of marriage, but I must respectfully disagree with your assessment of our time together.
The past couple of weeks have indeed been challenging, but I believe your decision to part ways is rather hasty. Let’s address some of the points you raised.
Your claim of being a good man for seven years merits some consideration. While there have been moments of kindness, they’ve been overshadowed by other behaviors. Regarding my soap opera habits, they serve as mere entertainment, not a means of drowning out any perceived negativity from our interactions.
As for the haircut incident, I did notice the change, but refrained from comment out of courtesy. And the meal you prepared? It seems there was some confusion, as I’ve abstained from pork for several years now. The silk boxers, while a thoughtful gesture, left me puzzled, especially considering the recent financial assistance provided to your sister.
Regarding your accusation of my lack of affection and intimacy, I can assure you it’s a shared sentiment. As for your assumption about my fidelity, I find it baseless and offensive.
Your decision to leave prompted me to reflect on our relationship. Despite our differences, I held hope for reconciliation, especially after my recent lottery win. Sadly, upon returning home with plans for our shared future, I found you gone.
I wish you the fulfillment and happiness you seek. As for your concerns about financial matters, rest assured, my legal counsel has advised me accordingly.
Regarding your revelation about your sister Carla, formerly Carl, it comes as a surprise but doesn’t change my feelings for you or her.
Take care,
Your Ex-Wife